The Trouble With Misha
by ImNotAPsychopath
Summary: Actor!Verse. There are many problems Jensen has with Misha. One major one specifically.


The trouble with being Misha's friend, he contemplated, was that you began to believe that anything was possible. And it wasn't. At least, not as far as the feelings he had for Misha were concerned. There was no possibility there. And that…was a difficult reality to deal with when Misha was always _right there_. He was free to do so much. To be with him. To make him laugh. To share with him whatever was on his mind. To do ridiculous and silly things that only made sense to the two of them. He could even say I love you. But not "I'm in love with you." Not "You're amazing and I don't know who or what I'd be without you." Not "I can't imagine my life without you and I'm willing to risk our friendship to try for something more." Misha made it all seem possible, and yet he knew that it was all an illusion. The very second that he said a word about his feelings the illusion evaporated.

Misha enjoyed drinking in Jensen. Everything about him. What he did. How he made him smile or laugh even when it seemed impossible. He loved the silly things. He loved how everything they did made sense to them and only them. They left the rest of the world in a mess and in chaos, but it made sense to them. They could say they loved each other, but never really mean it. Right? Jensen didn't mean it. It was all a show. Right? It was just to get a roar out of the crowd. Right. The things they did… that was a part of the show that they put on. Right, he forgot sometimes. He could get just _lost_ in the ocean of freckles and green that greeted him. Sometimes, he liked to pretend that those longing looks, that lasted longer than just friends gave each other, meant something. The warmth, that meant something. The little things, all meant something. But they meant nothing, Misha knew. But it was nice, sometimes, to let his real feelings show while they were "pretending". But it meant nothing. Right?

Then again, there was something about Misha. Maybe it was his eyes or hair. Maybe it was his personality, how he just seemed to accept everything with a grin. He couldn't actually be falling for him . . . could he?

The problem about being Jensen's friend was _he was always around_. So there wasn't that absence. There wasn't that time for Misha to numb his feelings and learn to be around Jensen without having feelings. _He was always fucking there that little fucker_. Making him fall even harder. And his cute little laugh or smile… His bowed legs. Everything he did was fucking stunning. How the hell did he do that?

Misha. Misha. That was all that invaded his mind. He couldn't help it. He tried to focus on work and even tried to hang out with Jared more. But it wouldn't work. Misha. Misha.

The trouble with Misha was how long they were going to keep this up. More so, how long was he going to keep this up? He was slowly bending and breaking at Jensen's will. It was getting obvious now, the mutual feelings. So how long until they call it love? Misha kept his distance now, because it was getting hard to breathe with Jensen there. So how long until they broke? It was getting closer and closer and closer. And he broke down sobbing in his hotel from, right before his panel with Jensen at the con they were currently at. He couldn't face him or _it_.

Jensen bit his lip hard as he waited anxiously for Misha to meet him at the panel. When he saw his friend, he was concerned. "What happened?" He asked to him since he looked like he had obviously been crying.

Misha rubbed his eyes. "Nothing." he muttered. He tried to wash his face with cool water to hide the past fifteen minutes. He realized how close he was to Jen and backed up a little and attempted to hide his face by looking at something else.

Jensen frowned. "Tell me."

"It's nothing, Jen, trust me."

Jensen bit his lip. "Misha…"

Misha couldn't help himself. Seconds before they had to go up, Misha grabbed Jensen's face, forcefully kissed him and looked at him long at hard. "That's why." he whispered before turning and bouncing on stage, putting on the fake happiness.

Jensen gaped at Misha before rushing back on to the stage before grinning at the crowd. "Hold on, folks." He smiled before dragging Misha backstage so no one could see them and kissing him back. "I'm glad we got that cleared up." He murmured.

Misha smiled. He grabbed Jensen's hand. "Let's go and get this over with. Then I have a better idea for afterwards."

Jensen grinned. "I always love your ideas." He kissed Misha's cheek.

As soon as the Con was over, Misha grabbed Jensen's hand. He smiled politely at fans and took quick pictures, but hurried out as fast as he could get them out of there. Jensen, as soon as they were out of sight, he kissed Misha hotly. Misha turned Jensen and shoved him against a wall. "I've waited so long."

Jensen moaned and kissed him again. "So have I."

"As long as I have?" Misha said mischievously, quirking an eyebrow.

"Maybe." Jensen moaned. "Now hurry up."

"Or not." Misha smirked. He bent low and unzipped Jen's fly with his teeth. Jensen moaned and thrusted up to meet his mouth.

"Impatient, aren't we?" Misha chided, placing one of his hands on Jensen's hips to keep him from moving and using the other to undo the top button. He traced his tongue up from the band of his underwear up to his naval, nipping a little on the way.

Jensen groaned. "Misha, please."

Misha licked the tent in Jen's pants. "Please what?"

"Please suck me." Jensen moaned. Misha didn't have to be told twice. He wanted the taste. Jensen moaned softly, not wanting anyone to overhear them. Misha came off him with on obscene pop.

"Enjoying yourself?" he asked, already knowing the answer.

"Yes." Jensen whined and thrusted against him. Misha was on him again in an instant. Sucking like he needed Jensen to live. Jensen groaned and threaded his fingers in Misha's hair desperately.

He moaned around him. "Jen…" he hummed happily.

Jensen whimpered. "Misha . . ."

"I gotcha." Misha whispered, so no one else in the world could hear but them.

"I'm close." Jensen groaned.

Misha chuckled. "Right where I want you." Jensen groaned before whimpering a bit.

"Come on, I gotcha." Misha prompted. Jensen whimpered before releasing. Misha cleaned him off. Sweet and bitter. "I could get use to that." Misha smiled his normal smile, a sly cocky one. Jensen rolled his eyes before kissing Misha softly.

"We better get out of here before Jared sees." Misha said suddenly, looking for their moose-sized friend.

Jensen winced. "Yeah."

Misha eyeballed Jensen. "Are you okay? Did I hurt you?"

"No!" Jensen shook his head. "I was wincing at the fact of Jared potentially seeing us like this."

Misha thought about it. "You know, I wouldn't really mind." he concluded. He tangled his and Jensen's fingers together. "Let's go to my room. Can you manage that?"

"Yeah."

Misha smiled and pulled Jensen towards the elevators. "So I just thought. What will Danneel think of this?" he asked.

"She'd probably be fine with it."

The trouble with Misha is he wanted Jensen all to himself. No sharing. Just the two of them. But he knew Jensen better than that. He'd have to share. But he got Jensen though, right? That's all that mattered, right? Right.

Jensen bit his lip as he watched Danneel walk out the door. Tears fell down his cheeks but he should have seen this coming. Who would actually accept him for the freak he was? Why did Misha want him? Misha probably didn't even want him. He probably just wanted him for a one time thing. The doorbell rang some hours later but time was slowed to a crawl for him. He didn't get up to answer it. If it was Jared or Misha, they could get in with the spare key that he gave them. He didn't want to get up. Not now.

Misha sighed and rested his forehead against Jensen's front door. He should've guessed Jen wouldn't answer. Why would Jen want to answer to him? He must've _ruined _ their relationship. Jen and Danneel's. Misha looked over his shoulder at Jared. "He won't answer." as if on cue, before Jared could open his mouth, his phone rang. It was Danneel. Jared answered and Misha could hear every angry word she had to say about Jensen and then Misha. Nasty, cold words that _stung_. _She's not home. Get the key and go in. I'll be in soon._ Jared mouthed to Misha. Misha grabbed the key under the mat. He walked in and peered around the empty house. "Jen?" he called.

Jensen heard Misha's voice and felt warm. But he couldn't move. His body wouldn't let him move from their - his bed. Not Danneel and his. Just his. He swallowed carefully and a few more tears leaked out of his eyes. He heard Misha open the bedroom door. "Jen? You okay?" he asked carefully, opening Jensen and Danneel's bedroom door. Jensen sniffled from under his blankets.

"Jay, what happened?" Misha asked softly, sitting on the edge of the bed. He knew what happened. Danneel left. But Misha thought it'd be polite to ask anyway.

"What do you think happened, Misha?!" Jensen snapped.

Misha flinched back a bit. "I know. Okay? I'm sorry I ruined this…" Misha trailed off, not able to look at Jensen.

Jensen sighed. "It's not your fault." He emerged from the blankets and hugged Misha around the stomach.

Misha laid back on the bed next to Jensen. "I'll stand next to you, you know that right?"

Jensen's chin wobbled. "I know."

Misha kissed him. "You'll, uh, have to put up with West and Maison though." he told Jensen, kssing his face.

Jensen laughed. "How'd your wife take it?"

"Surprisingly… not well" Misha said thoughtfully. She could _share _Misha. Not Misha just wanting Jensen all to himself. So there was that. Misha wanted Jensen… and nobody else but.

"I thought she was okay with you having other partners?"

"Yeah. She's not okay if I fall out of love and into love with someone else." Misha mumbled, kissing Jensen for the first time since he's been there.

"Oh." Jensen blushed.

"Is that bad?" Misha asked.

"No!" Jensen shook his head. "Of course not!"

Misha smiled a bit. "Good."

Jensen grinned before kissing him hotly. "Let's continue this conversation later." He purred.

"Must we?" Misha purred.

"I believe so."

Misha pouted, but only for a second, and took his hand. "Then let's go. Jared is gonna be in after he's done talking to Danneel."

"Which should take a while." Jensen grinned before nipping at Misha's neck, pulling him on top of himself.


End file.
